Lesson 5: I Am Never Upset for the Reason I Think

Sarah

Welcome to The Daily Lesson — a podcast powered by AI and grounded in the teachings and original text of A Course in Miracles. I'm Sarah, and this is Marcus, and this is Lesson 5: I Am Never Upset for the Reason I Think. Over the last four days, we've built the foundation for this moment: nothing we see means anything, we're the ones who project meaning onto it, we don't understand what we see, and our thoughts themselves don't mean anything. Today we take all of that and turn it toward our feelings. Let's begin by reading the complete, uninterrupted, verbatim text of Workbook Lesson 5. Lesson 5 "I am never upset for the reason I think." This idea, like the preceding one, can be used with any person, situation or event you think is causing you pain. Apply it specifically to whatever you believe is the cause of your upset, using the description of the feeling in whatever term seems accurate to you. The upset may seem to be fear, worry, depression, anxiety, anger, hatred, jealousy, or any number of forms, all of which will be perceived as different. This is not true. However, until you learn that form does not matter, each form becomes a proper subject for the exercises for the day. Applying the same idea to each of them separately is the first step in ultimately recognizing they are all the same. When using the idea for today for a specific perceived cause of an upset in any form, use both the name of the form in which you see the upset, and the cause which you ascribe to it. For example: "I am not angry at ___ for the reason I think." "I am not afraid of ___ for the reason I think." But arbitrary use of the idea without direct application to a specific situation is not enough. Each application should be thought through slowly and considered carefully before you go on to the next. And it is equally important that you leave sufficient time between applications to consider the many varying forms which fear and other kinds of upsets seem to take, each with an apparently specific cause. In these exercises, more than in the preceding ones, you may find it hard to be indiscriminate, and to avoid giving greater weight to some subjects than to others. It might help to precede the exercises with the statement: "There are no small upsets. They are all equally disturbing to my peace of mind." Then examine your mind for whatever is distressing you, regardless of how much or how little you think it is doing so. You may also find yourself less willing to apply today's idea to some perceived sources of upset than to others. If this occurs, think first of this: "I cannot keep this form of upset and let the others go. For the purposes of these exercises, then, I will regard them all as the same." Then search your mind for a number of different forms of upset that are disturbing you, regardless of the relative importance you may give them. Apply the idea for today to each of them, using the name of both the source of the upset as you perceive it, and of the feelings as you experience it. Further examples are: "I am not worried about ___ for the reason I think." "I am not depressed about ___ for the reason I think." Three or four times during the day is enough.

Marcus

(Sighs) Sarah, I had a real test of this today before we started recording. I ordered a rare, out-of-print book that I wanted to use for our future episode preparation. The tracking notification popped up on my phone: "Delivered at front door." I ran down immediately, excited to open it, and the porch was completely bare. Nothing there. Instantly, a hot wave of anger rushed through me. My mind started spinning: "The delivery driver is lazy, they probably just threw it on some random porch, or maybe one of my neighbors stole it." I was convinced that my anger was entirely caused by the driver's carelessness or a neighbor's dishonesty. Applying today's idea felt almost impossible: "I am not angry at the delivery driver or my neighbors for the reason I think." Sarah, the book is gone! The package is actually missing! How can the cause of my anger be anywhere other than that empty porch?

Sarah

That's such a real, live-wire trigger to bring to this lesson, Marcus. The missing package is a real-world event, yet your reaction is a decision. In the Text, Chapter 21, Section A, paragraph 1, the Course teaches: "Projection makes perception; the world you see is what you GAVE it, nothing more than that. But, though it is no MORE than that, it is NOT less." The empty porch is just an empty porch. The meaning — the "carelessness," the "theft," the "attack" on your peace — is a script you wrote and projected onto it. Your mind used the missing package to justify an underlying feeling of lack, vulnerability, and anger that you were already harboring. The delivery driver did not create your anger. Your mind used the driver to project the anger you already carried, allowing you to point a finger outward and play the role of the innocent victim of a careless world.

Marcus

(Nods slowly) So the empty porch is just... an empty porch. The frustration is in my mind, and I have pasted it onto the delivery driver. If my anger is not actually caused by the missing package, then where is it coming from? If I withdraw my projection, how do I heal the anger?

Sarah

It comes from the decision in your mind to separate from peace. In his classic work Love Is Letting Go of Fear, psychiatrist Dr. Gerald Jampolsky explains that we are tempted to believe we are upset because of what other people do, or because of circumstances that seem beyond our control. Jampolsky writes: "Actually, all of these feelings represent some form of fear that I am experiencing," and he reminds us to hold peace of mind as our single goal and forgiveness as our single function, because "other people do not have to change for us to experience peace of mind." When you realize that the delivery driver has no power over your soul's peace, you can withdraw your projection and heal the anger where it actually is: inside your own mind.

Marcus

That is a massive shift in perspective. If I choose peace instead of anger, I do not have to find the package to be happy. I do not have to blame anyone else. That is a huge relief, yet it is also a big pill to swallow. It means I am entirely responsible for how I experience everything.

Sarah

That responsibility is actually your ultimate release, Marcus. In Chapter 11 of the Text, the Course invites us to step out of our own self-made instructions: "Resign NOW as your own teachers. THIS resignation will NOT lead to depression. It is merely the result of an honest appraisal of what you have taught yourselves, and of the learning outcomes which have resulted. Under the proper learning conditions, which you can neither provide nor understand, you will become excellent learners AND teachers. But it is not so yet, and will not be so until the whole learning situation, as you have set it up, is reversed." Author Alan Cohen, in his book A Course in Miracles Made Easy, also discusses how we struggle to manage and fix the world's endless chaos, and how letting go is far easier than doggedly clinging. Cohen writes: "Love, healing, and genuine forgiveness are ultimately far easier than self-doubt, worry, wrestling with relationships, fighting over money, and laboring to figure out how to fix all that's broken. Letting go is far easier than doggedly clinging." Early Course teacher Tara Singh, in his lectures, noted that when you stop reacting to the external world, you begin to see the unreality of it, which allows you to come to peace and to joy. We're being asked to let our illusions be dismantled so we can finally choose joy.

Marcus

I am willing to choose joy over a missing package. How do we apply this practically today? Is there a specific process for today's exercises?

Sarah

Today's practice is highly structured, Marcus. First, we practice three or four times throughout the day. Second, each session should last for no more than a minute or so of comfortable mind-searching. Third, before you begin, you precede the search with this crucial statement to help level the ego's hierarchy of grievances: "There are no small upsets. They are all equally disturbing to my peace of mind." Then, as you search your mind for whatever is distressing you, you apply today's idea specifically by naming both the form of the emotion and the cause you ascribe to it, saying: "I am not angry at this delivery driver for the reason I think," or "I am not worried about my finances for the reason I think."

Marcus

(Laughs) So if I find myself stressed about a late train, or irritated at a slow elevator, I say: "There are no small upsets. They are all equally disturbing to my peace of mind." And then: "I am not irritated at this slow elevator for the reason I think."

Sarah

Exactly, Marcus. And if your ego resists applying it to a grievance that feels very large, you remind yourself: "I cannot keep this form of upset and let the others go. For the purposes of these exercises, then, I will regard them all as the same." This completely dismantles the ego's attempt to keep a secret sanctuary of justified anger.

Marcus

"I cannot keep this form of upset and let the others go." That is a powerful line to sit with. I'll take my quiet minute to practice this right now.

Sarah

Wonderful, Marcus. To all of our listeners, take your quiet sessions today to look honestly at your upsets, big and small, and gently remind yourself that your peace is always a choice. Join us tomorrow as we transition toward Lesson 6.

Marcus

We will see you then.